Tuesday, August 15, 2017

Red Light Justice

I had a ticket for running a red light.

The intersection was restricted due to construction. The speed limit was 30 miles an hour. There was a police car in the left turn lane, but with his tail of his car sticking out into lane 1.

Knowing the intersection and the light was about to turn, I looked over my left shoulder assuring a car would not try to beat it through lane one and possibly shove me over. Just a quick look over my shoulder and back. When I took my eyes off the intersection, I was about 15' from the intersection and the light was green. I traveled the distance and when I looked back the light was red and I was already entering the intersection. What happened to yellow?

The police car immediately took pursuit and gave me a ticket.

I took the ticket and pled not guilty.

In the meantime, I went to the intersection with a stop watch. The time the light was yellow was 1.5 seconds. I spoke to the City Engineer and the size of the intersection dictated the time for the yellow was 3 seconds. I asked for and received a letter from the Engineer and presented that with my statement to the court.

I was found not-guilty.

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Levi Strauss was squatting around a campfire with a brand new pair of riveted jeans. He was asking the cowboy companions how they liked the rivet reinforced jeans. The Cowboys said they were fine, but they would automatically remove the one in the crotch area. Mr. Strauss was confused as this seam took most of the strain during work, and that seam was most likely to split. The Cowboys said it was because of the "Hot Rivet Syndrome." The Cowboys explained that squatting at a fire as they were, that particular rivet would heat up and burn a particularly sensitive area in the male anatomy. Shortly, Levi Strauss leaped up and went screaming into the night. Yep, he was a victim of the Hot Rivet Syndrome. He enjoyed the rest of his trip and when he went back to the factory, immediately ordering the crotch rivet be removed from the production of his famous jeans. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.